ALL AND ANY HELP IS APPRECIATED!!!! PLEASE PLEASE!
This flashback is a little different and that's because today I am in the midst of the girl's room and I have come to the point after working for an hour that I just want to BLOW IT UP!!! I have struggled for YEARS with this issue! Neither of my girls have ANY desire to keep their room clean, they share a room, and while it isn't ideal, it is what it is! As parents we have tried just about EVERYTHING, reward programs, taking it all away and making them earn it back, taking it away and donating it to charity, moving, throwing it away, bribery, you name it and most likely we have done it! Now some of them have worked better than others but every time it will last at the most for a few weeks and then they revert right back!!
Of course if you ask the girls, Lexi will say "It's all Grace!" and Grace will say "Well, Lexi has to help me clean it!" I have bought every kind of organization bin, bucket, basket, imaginable and spent HOURS organizing it and then giving them a tour of their room showing them where everything goes and NOTHING!! It usually comes down to me or Jimmy telling them they have 20 min to get it picked up or it is all going in the trash to motivate them! I have on my hands two pack rats, who want to save EVERY paper, McDonald's toy, stuffed animal, Barbie, Polly Pocket, tea set, jump rope, puzzle, baby doll, they have EVER HAD!! Alexis is so bad that she can tell you where each and every item came from, who gave it to her, and how old she was when she got it! If I want to OVERHAUL the room I have to wait until neither of them are within 5 miles of the house, or they will prevent me from getting rid of anything! I have used the angle of "We are going to take these to children who don't have anything.", then I have had them come with me to drop it off at the donation center and still here I am pulling my hair out as I sort, bag, trash, donate, put away, fold my way through their room!! PLEASE HELP! PLEASE! I really could use some new ideas, support, wisdom on the subject!
Oh and one other issue, Lexi is perhaps the worst at shoving, hiding, and disguising where she puts things. I will hand her three shirts on hangers and tell her to hang them up and I will find them a week later shoved under her bed, in a drawer, or as of late, the bottom of her dirty clothes hamper!!!!! ARGH!!!!! That girl!!
Now just a low down on space that is available for their crap!
Their room
One Closet
Under their beds
One 5 drawer dresser
One toy chest
Millions of bins, baskets, buckets
One book case
Oh and just for the record, I still love them!! :P
8 comments:
When you come up with a good solution...let me know. I could literally have written this same post about my girls word for word. I have given up on even going over to that side of the house unless company is coming over. At least they aren't boys. My boys do the same thing too AND they stink. Ugh!
First, Good Luck! My girls have started to grow out of most of the messy things. So I need to move this system to Carson. I have plastic draws that have Polly pockets, plastic food, dress up shoes, littlest pet shop, etc. I put them up high in the closet where they can't reach and I will only get them down they toys they want if they have cleaned up what they have out. This also help to keep all the thing separated and in the right bins, draws, baskets whatever you have. I have also found that keeping the kids rooms clean is a daily maintenance job too. Pulse I refuse to keep any kids meal toys I don't like to even bring them into the house.
I SO relate!
I wonder if having girls with several years between them makes this harder? Katy and Anna just don't play the same, and Anna just can't pick up as well yet, so I know I put a lot more of it on Katy.
We do best when I make them clean everyday and all privleges rely on it. And now that school is in, Anna knows that there is no one to make messes in there but her. But there are always those weeks that seem extra busy and before we realize it, there is days and days worth of play lying there on the floor.
When it gets really bad, I scoop it all up in garbage bags and hide it away until they get on top of things and then we go through a bag here and there.
Good Luck!
I wish I had some wisdom or brilliant idea to share. Instead I'm anxiously awaiting the arrival of comments from any of your readers who DO have ideas! I'm desperate as well!!
I went and consulted my "Parenting with Love and Logic" book because I knew it mentioned this exact thing. (I love this book. Buy it if you don't have it yet. It puts a heavy emphasis on raising kids to be responsible for their actions, whatever they might be.) Here's a little summary if you want to read it:
http://www.bettendorf.k12.ia.us/elem%20counselors/resources/logic.pdf
and the specific thing they suggest is to give them a good incentive to do it (we're going to the amusement park on Saturday, so if your room is clean, you can come, otherwise we can get a babysitter for you) and then give them the option to "hire someone" else to clean it, and if they don't have any money, they can sell something that they have. Most kids just choose to clean their rooms rather than sell a beloved toy. Also, the book also says to let them live in it messy on the other days, unless one wants it clean, then you have to separate them. ANYWAY, sorry if that was long and confusing. Check out the book. And good luck. :)
By the way---boys do this too.
They want lots of clothes, but can't take care of the ones they have.
I go through the same thing but with the playroom. I can't tell you how many times I say, "When you're done playing with something clean it up." The only thing that works for us is that we have to make cleaning the play room a nightly thing. Eat dinner, do homework, clean up playroom, get a treat. If they don't do their chores at night they don't get a treat. And I stay in the room and help them, otherwise it would never get done. I know Lexi is older and should be able to do it, but if you're in there, giving directions, picking up a few things with them, I think it will help.
Yeah. The eternal maternal question. Good luck to us all.
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