Stepford Wives Syndrome

Have you ever felt like you just blend in with the crowd? That there isn't really anything unique about yourself? I had a discussion with a close friend lately about how now a days it seems like all the young moms know how to do EVERYTHING!! You know, as in; sing, dance, run, sew, photography, cook, clean, craft, well educated, perform open heart surgery, write a novel, paint, legally defend themselves in court, run for office, etc. etc. etc.!! Maybe one of the repercussions of so much communication and keeping in touch is that as Mom's and wives, we are able to compare ourselves to strangers and friends alike, in ways we never thought possible! Talents that might have stayed quietly in a home a few years ago are now displayed on etsy or on a craft/photography blog. I mean look at me I have a craft blog and a photography blog, I am one hot mess I tell ya what!!

It's tough not to wonder why we aren't able to do what other mom's do, to not compare ourselves against the "perfect" pictures painted. I think many of us blog for very similar reasons, of course to keep a journal for our family and turn it into a book right after we are done fixing dinner and folding the last of 18 loads of laundry. I also believe that we all need a little pat on the back, you know the kind that says "Keep truckin lady, hang in there, you are doing great!!". I know I have a need for that validation, don't you? I just want to know if I am at least headed in the right direction and not off some cliff. Is it vanity, maybe, but mostly I want support and knowing I am not alone in this life called, Good Gosh This Can Be Tough Sometimes!

It all starts from that place, and then it morphs into, Good Gosh, all These Mom's are so Much Better at This Than I am!! Is it no longer acceptable to admit we aren't good at EVERYTHING?? Do we have to be the "Jack of All Trades" or rather the "Julie of All Trades"??? I don't think it was supposed to end up that way, we are too hard on ourselves, we leave no room to mess up!



I for one love to meet people who know how to do things that I don't, so they can teach me some of their knowledge and maybe in return I can teach them something, even if it is just how to hang their toilet paper "correctly". I mean if you all knew some of the friends I have, oh wait, that's you, so you already know yourself. Just in case you have forgotten let me introduce you to yourself. Here are just some of the qualities and talents that YOU have (some might belong to someone else, but guess what? That's OK!)

*Smart
*Funny
*Kind
*Generous
*Loving
*Patient
*Sensitive
*Peacemaker
*Artist
*Chef
*Athlete
*Crafter
*Teacher
*Musician
*Counselor
*Home Maker
*Friend
*Baker
*Interior Decorator
*Jungle Gym (your kids have to have something to climb on)
*Clown (they also have to have something to make them laugh)


Now maybe you are thinking, "well I am only ONE of those things", but I am here to tell you that if you are just one, than it's OK, it's enough. If you are the clown that makes your children belly laugh, than be the best clown you can be, make those silly faces like no body's business! If you are the Baker, then bake those cupcakes and eat them too!! Maybe you are the Home Maker who sees little value in your ability to keep up on laundry, cleaning and keeping your kids bathed, well take note, that is NO SMALL TASK!! We don't have to be like all the other Mom's on the block, in the ward, or on the computer, just be YOU!!


Perhaps I am the worst at beating myself up for all the things I'm not, but Gosh Darn people at least I am the best at being the worst!! No, just kidding, I know that I punish myself for not being the "perfect" wife, the "doting" mother who never takes her child to school on the wrong day. Looking at my family and friends who run marathons, 1/2 marathons, triathlons, while 5 months pregnant I want to punch myself for only doing an Iron Man while in labor!! Where will the punishment stop? Do I have to climb Mt. Everest with 8 kids strapped to my back, while I plan the family reunion and then figure out how to get from the top to Soccer practice in less than 45 minutes?? Would I be happy then? Sadly, probably not.

So for once, here is to us (raising glass of sparkling cider), here is to all we do for our husbands, children, homes, churches, schools, jobs, the planet. Say no to the tendencies to line yourself up next to everyone else and point out all the bad, instead raise your right arm high above your head, bend it at the elbow and pat yourself on the back cause lady you are one fantastic piece of Heaven!!

I have decided right now to begin highlighting some amazing women. If you know someone who is unbelievable and they fail to give themselves credit then send me and email at marylinkelley@gmail.com and tell me about them, along with a picture, if you think I don't have one already (hey I have a lot of pictures) and I will highlight them on my blog!! Twice a month I will focus on these special friends, mothers, sisters, aunts, teachers just to give them the little pat that they deserve. I will start with perhaps the hardest person I can think of to start with!!


The something about myself that I like the most is my ability to make others laugh! I love laughter, it releases stress and sadness. I love a great smile, the kind that brings out the lines on your face and squints your eyes! I love to make people happy, if I could spend everyday for the rest of my life just making people laugh that would be alright with me! Love to you and can't wait to hear about the special women in your lives!!